Originally posted on CaringBridge: Journal Entry by Tracy Wade — January 15, 2019

For The Love Farm | DIY: Lazy Lawn Removal!

That moment when reality comes right up and smacks you in the face because you are being dumb!!! That’s what happened Saturday. I had this amazing idea to join a fitness club 3 weeks before surgery so I could get my muscles and tissue in the best shape possible. I signed up on Thursday and spent 2 days running, ellipticaling and lifting weights. I felt awesome. I felt 20 years old. Nothing hurt. I kept moving the little weight peg because I was amazed at my strength. I left feeling empowered and giddy. Then I woke up Saturday morning. Well, my brain woke up but my back decided it just wasn’t up for moving around and doing adulting kind of things. It decided I needed to lay very still or it would go into complete spasm. WHAT HAVE I DONE? Gone were the 15,000 steps-per-day! Sunday I took 3,000 steps that made my eyes water. Monday I ended up back at my incredibly awesome naturopath, Dr. Bhandari and he did all kinds of cool stuff. Adjustments, electro-magnetic stim, and a prescription for a muscle relaxer. I can’t take time off work because I absolutely need every sick day possible when I have surgery. It’s been a week. AND IT’S ONLY TUESDAY!

Today, I met with physical therapy at Valley so they could take measurements and we talked about the importance of rest and me following the rules that could keep me from getting lymphedema. All these new things. Turns out after surgery I won’t ever be able to have my blood pressure taken on my left arm. Ever again. Who knew that was a side effect of breast cancer? Loved my therapist. She’s a tennis player so she understands my need to get back on the court. 

I have been scheduled for my PET scan next Thursday. This will be a 2-hour scan with contrast. That’s the last appointment before the big day. It’s weird that I will walk around with cancer tumors for 2 more weeks but I feel some nesting instincts kicking in so I’ll use my time wisely. Although with this back injury I might just sit on the couch and watch the Australian Open for 2 weeks. Steve and I are actively planning the For The Love Farm in the backyard. We are sketching potager gardens and plan to start digging in March. Right now we look like backyard hillbillies as we are trying to kill the grass naturally. Laying down newspaper, cardboard and tarps seems much easier than renting a sod cutter. A potager garden is a whimsical, romantic and artistic kitchen garden. It will be a mix of veggies, herbs and flowers. We are collecting building materials for beds and making lists of everything we are going to grow. Don’t worry, we will be inviting you all over in March for a Raise the Bed party!!!

This year is going to be full of surprises and amazing learnings! We are excited for our future and even though it’s going to be tough we know it will be even more rewarding than we ever knew. As always we are so grateful.

Journal Comments

• Joanie Guggenmos : When we come over next Monday we’ll bring the latest seed catalog from Territorial Seed Company. You can sit on the couch and decide what you want to grow in your potage garden, your For The Love Farm. You kids are loved more than you will ever know.1heartsMoreHeart•Reply•1/16/19
• Sally Brown : I love your garden. All the things you will be growing will be representative of your new life as you watch everything grow and thrive. I love you, Tee Tee.2heartsMoreHeart•Reply•1/16/19
• Donna Cleary : Praying for you. I love your positivity. ❤️1heartsMoreHeart•Reply•1/16/19
• Kim Streamer : LOVE the garden concept…you are inspiring, always. ❤️ Easy on the weights and heavy on the rest so your back can heal and you can continue to map out those awesome garden plans. So grateful for you (and your authentic and inspiring updates). 😘1heartsMoreHeart•Reply•1/15/19
• Wendy Luikart : You’re so strong, you don’t need weights or training! You’ve got this, Tracy. It will be here before you know it, and it will creep by at the same time. Make some lists of great movies and save them. Download some audiobooks and hold them until after surgery. Buy your favorite candles and have them waiting for your princess arrival, post surgery. You deserve every bit of pampering. Thank for updating! Can’t wait to see your garden grow along with your new, healthy life, cancer-free!!!